


I’m Only Dreaming (of a Friend)

by AspiringToInspire



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: F/M, Light Angst, Panic Attacks, Post-Episode: s03 Miracle Queen (The Battle of the Miraculous Part 2), Quote: Just a friend (Miraculous Ladybug), tagging that just in case
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-14
Updated: 2020-06-14
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:34:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24712444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AspiringToInspire/pseuds/AspiringToInspire
Summary: “They're only dreams, he tells himself when he sometimes wakes up feeling as if they're all too real to be. I'm only dreaming. What else could this be?”-or, the one where Adrien keeps dreaming about Marinette, but it’s probably not in the way that you’re hoping
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Comments: 24
Kudos: 143





	I’m Only Dreaming (of a Friend)

Dreams.

They started off as dreams, as a series of fleeting images and emotions that, at first, seemed to be thrown at him completely at random.

The first few times, he couldn't remember them. Like any other dream, when he'd woken up the next morning, he'd felt the memory of them slipping away from him and melting into his bed sheets as mere seconds passed.

It was only after countless more nights filled with these dreams and twist and turns and waking up heavily breathing at three a.m., that he realized that they weren't random at all, that these images and emotions replaying over and over in the front of his mind almost every night that he couldn't for the life of him understand were actually all interconnected, and at the center of them all, there was one thing, or one _person_ , really, and she sits behind him in class.

Adrien couldn't tell you exactly when they started, these dreams. He thinks that maybe he began having them when the ache that came with being in love with Ladybug started to painfully weigh his heart down, but he isn't entirely sure.

Other times, he's nearly certain that they definitely started after he'd had that talk with Marinette after Manon had been akumatized for the second time, when she'd assured him that she didn't hate him and that they _were_ friends.

A lot has changed since that day. It's as if he and Marinette have grown closer but a wall has risen up between them simultaneously. Adrien doesn't know how to explain it. She talks to him in the way that she does everyone else now, with no stammering or surprised screeches hindering her, so he's no longer afraid that his mere presence makes her almost unbearably uncomfortable, but, as ecstatic as he is about _that_ , there's something else there. He's sure of it. He was before the dreams even started.

"Yeah, I'm glad we're _friends_ ," she'd muttered in the car on the way to her house that day as she'd curled up slightly and turned away from him.

"The orange and peppermint ice cream for- for my _friends_ here," she'd smiled weakly and looked back at him and Kagami just a few weeks later, when the three of them had gotten ice cream together at André’s.

Why did she always say the word 'friend' like it stung her tongue?

"I think the _real_ question is," Plagg had rolled his eyes at him as he swallowed an abnormally large piece of Camembert in one go, but really, what else was new, before finishing, "why are you thinking about Pigtails at this hour when you're _dating_ Kagami now?"

"I'm not-" Adrien had cut himself off, sighing and shaking his head. He hadn't even known what he was about to tell him. His head was all over the place. "Whatever, Plagg. It's been a long day. We should get some rest."

He hadn't _only_ said that in an attempt to drop the conversation. It had been an unusually crazy day, after all, even for them, so he'd hit the lights and waited for sleep to come to him. It didn't for hours.

" ** _I've realized..._** " he'd told Marinette in his dreams that night, when it finally did, wearing the beret from his fan club in Brazil that Ladybug had delivered for him, " ** _I've realized that you're not just a friend to me. I've always felt like you were more than that,_** " he'd taken her hand in his and smiled softly at her, " ** _and now, I know why._** "

" ** _Does uh, does this mean that you- you like the beret?_** " She'd asked, looking up at him nervously, _hopefully_.

He'd gazed down at her, feeling as if he was truly _seeing_ her for the very first time, giving her the look that he'd reserved for Ladybug, for _her_. " ** _It means that I love you._** "

He'd woken up in a cold sweat.

-

They're only dreams, he tells himself when he sometimes wakes up feeling as if they're all too real to be. _I'm only dreaming._ What else could this be?

Adrien had tried asking Plagg once if maybe what was plaguing him at night had anything to do with his miraculous or the fact that Master Fu was gone now, but predictably, he hadn't been much help.

Despite that, he felt that he was just starting to get used to them, really, when everything changed once more, because not long after that did they start playing in the front of his mind at random times during his _day_ too.

The first time it happened, Adrien briefly wondered if he was going insane. It was so realistic, it seemed like he was experiencing his daydreams in real time. He’d wanted to ask Ladybug about it, but he’d figured that she had enough on her plate being the new guardian and all.

"Hey, sunshine," Alya grins at him one day after his nightmares and daydreams have both become his new normal as he makes his way towards his friends in the courtyard. "We're heading to Juleka's after school today to watch Kitty Section rehearse. Think you can make it?"

**_He's dancing with Marinette on the houseboat._ **

Adrien blinks, shakes the image out of his head. ‘ _Not now_ ,’ he almost groans out loud in annoyance. "I'll uh, I'll have to ask my father, but I think there's a good chance of me being able to go. My schedule's actually almost completely free today, save for fencing practice."

"Well, hopefully he says yes this time," Marinette smiles at him, putting a hand on his shoulder. **_They're pressed close together, and he's wearing his fan club beret again, and she has her hair down._ **He swallows, bringing his attention back to their conversation. "Maybe you can bring Kagami too. We missed you both at the last rehearsal."

**_It's their song. Their song is playing. They're dancing together to their song._ **

"I'll ask her," he smiles back at her, mentally thanking his modeling career for his ability to perfect one even when it's the last thing that he wants to be doing.

-

His father ends up allowing him to go for just an hour, and Kagami is granted permission to accompany him as well.

"Thank you for inviting me this evening, Adrien," she squeezes his hand when they get on deck.

"Of course," he twinkles at her easily.

"Hey, you guys made it!" A familiar voice greets them, and they both turn to see Marinette... with her hair down. ‘ _Of_ course _her hair is down._ ‘ He actually wouldn't be surprised if he was daydreaming again, but he doesn't think that he is this time.

"Hello, Marinette. You're wearing your hair down again," Kagami comments, confirming his thoughts. "You look great, as you always do."

Marinette's eyebrows furrow, and she brings a hand up to it somewhat absently. "Oh, I forgot. Thanks, Kagami! I was just messing around with the band when my hair came loose."

" ** _You were about to be akumatized. I didn't have a choice._** " Adrien's breath hitches. ‘ _Please, no. Not right now._ ’

"Come sit down." She excitedly grabs both their wrists and hauls them over to where everyone else is sitting in front of the stage area. The sun is already setting by now, creating a beautiful, orange glow that bathes the _Liberty_ in warm light and looms over the Seine. **_Water. There's water, and plenty of it. It's flooding and there's ruin and the moon and white._ Everything _is white._ **"You arrived just in time. Kitty Section's about to start playing."

"Dudes! You're here," Nino exclaims happily, giving his best bro a hug and Kagami an only slightly awkward fist bump. "So glad to see they let you both escape today."

"Kagami, come sit with us," Alya ushers her over to where the girls are all seated together.

She gives Adrien a kiss on the cheek before going, and Marinette turns to him before she joins them too. "Oh, Adrien- **_forgive me, we're just- we're just not right for each other._** "

He takes a step back from her. "Sorry, w-what?" What did she just say?

Marinette giggles lightly, **_and suddenly he's back in his beret, feeding her Andre's ice cream._** ‘ _No, stop_ ,’ he scolds himself. "I asked if you wanted to play keys." She tilts her head in the band's direction, and he glances over to see Luka smiling and waving at him as he tunes his guitar. "Luka said that you could play the keyboard for a few songs if you were up to it."

He shakes his head a bit. "No. No, I shouldn't, but thank you." He doesn't think that he'd do a very good job at it today with the way that he keeps drifting in and out of reality and his head is spinning.

Marinette frowns in concern at his tone. "Are you okay, Adrien?"

**_No, because he's alone on a roof, without his lady, the moon is damaged, and he feels an ache clawing at his insides, causing him a greater pain than any that he's ever known._ **

"Yes, I'm fine," he lies, trying to smile for her, but inside, he feels his heart rate pick up, and his breath quickens. The images are coming at him more frequently than they ever have, and it's as if he's feeling all the terrible emotions that come along with them at once. ‘ _Please make it stop. Make it stop. Make it stop!_ ’ "It's um, really nice of you to worry about me, Marinette."

"Of course," she beams, placing her hand on his shoulder again. Her touch scorches him, but he stays where he is, basking in it. " ** _My poor kitty._** " He closes his eyes and fights against his emotions, against the _memory_. "You're my friend, Adrien." She squeezes his shoulder gently before walking away from him then, and he feels his stomach drop as the music behind him picks up. _Friend_.

His thoughts consume him.

" ** _Give me your miraculous so that I can make everything go back to the way it was!_** "

No.

" ** _It's heartbreak for all the girls in Paris as supermodel Adrien Agreste has a girlfriend: classmate Marinette Dupain-_ _Cheng!_** ”

_No_.

" ** _What are you talking about? Of course we are. We love each other._** "

" ** _No, I don't... love you anymore._** "

No!

" ** _Save me._** "

" ** _It can't end like this! It can't end at all!_** "

No, no, no!

" ** _Milady._** "

" ** _My prince._** "

NO!

" ** _It was our love that did this to the world!_** "

Stop, stop, please make it stop!

He cycles through them all in a matter of minutes, because she finally said it _normally_. He's her _friend_ and she is his, and that’s it. 

Nino calls him over before he can make a break for it and never look back. He comes up to him when Adrien doesn't answer or even turn to look at him and immediately panics when he’s near enough to see his face.

He starts running a hand down his back, guiding him over to a corner where no one can see them and pulls him to his chest when he sees that his best bud is breathing roughly and his eyes are glossed over.

”Hey. Hey, you alright, man?" No, he thinks, and he's not sure that he ever will be again after all that's he seen, even if they are _just dreams_ , so he doesn't answer him. He doesn't know how. "It's okay, bro," Nino coaxes carefully nonetheless. "I'm here. I'm here."

He takes Adrien back only after he's calmed down and ensured him that he's okay and wants to stay, it was just stress catching up to him, that's all, and he knows that Nino is always there if he needs to talk, Adrien promises. He goes to sit next to Kagami, and since it's only been a few minutes, she simply smiles at him and holds his hand for a second, as if just to make sure that he’s there, but she doesn't say or ask anything. He's more than grateful.

The hour drags on after that, but Adrien survives it, even manages to speak to his friends a few times without his voice giving away the fact that he currently feels like he's living a nightmare.

The daydreams have stopped for now, but their effects still linger, that much is clear when every hair on the back of neck stands up as soon as Kitty Section starts playing a slow song, _the_ slow song to be exact.

He can't help but glimpse over at Marinette then, whom he's avoided all evening, and he feels the lump in his throat rise up the second that he does. It’s _their_ song, and she doesn’t even know it, because it isn’t even, not really.

He’s sure he’s delusional.

"You should ask her to dance," Kagami suggests quietly from beside him, following his line of sight.

"Who?" He asks, taking his eyes off Marinette to peer at her as his eyebrows pinch together in perplexity even though they really don't have to.

"Marinette," she tells him gently, playing along and giving him a small smile. "I've been watching you two all evening, Adrien. I see the way that you've been looking at her since she walked away from you earlier. I see the way that she's been looking at you. You should ask her to dance. I think she'd like that. You both would."

"What?" He tries to swallow past the lodge in his windpipe and see past the tears that prick at his eyes again. He looks away from her, shaking his head, and taking a deep breath to calm himself a second time. "No, Marinette's just... she's just a friend."

She has to be.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! So I originally thought of this idea at three a.m. this morning, and it was only supposed to be like a 300 word drabble where I wanted to explain an instance where Adrien would *have* to consider Marinette just a friend and not one where he's just too in love with LB/ too oblivious to realize his feelings for her, and I'm not quite sure how it turned into this, but I guess that I'm just not over Chat Blanc, sooo... let me know what you thought! Sorry if it sucked x


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